Four Pillars was featured in the March 2016 issue of Natural Awakenings. Read more to know how a life coach can help, the difference between life coaching and therapy and more.
Debunking Your Frequently Asked Questions About Life Coaching
Celebrate Love
A blog about love for Valentine’s Week? Really? How cliché?
No, it’s not because it’s Valentine’s Day week. It’s because there are two basic motivating forces in life: fear or love. And this is an important time to remind ourselves this basic premise. When we are afraid, we pull back, put up walls, make poor choices and guard ourselves from life and living. When we act out of love, we are open to all that life has to offer, we are energized, feel purpose, passion, and are energized for our living.
This is such a basic principle, love or fear, but as we get caught up
in everyday living sometimes we get off track.
How do we speak to ourselves? Do we say positive words or are we self-criticizing. How are we taking care of our needs? Are we exercising, eating well, getting out and breathing in nature, taking care of our mind, body, and spirit. When we self-care, and are self-aware (not selfish), we have enough love filled within us that it pours out of us to others.
How do we speak to others? Are we speaking their love language? Dr. Gary Chapman teaches the 5 languages of love and how it is important that we learn to speak their language if we want that person to feel loved. The 5 Languages are: words of affirmation, acts of service, receiving gifts, quality time, and physical touch.
Love is an emotion with an actual energy. Everything in this Universe, including you is vibrating at a frequency. This is because you and everything around you is energy. Love has an actual measureable frequency. 528 Hz-the love frequency. The energy of the Earth is 528Hz frequency which is the same frequency as love. Raise your energy with LOVE.
Did you know the essential oil with the highest frequency is rose oil?
From roses, hmmm… the flower associated with LOVE.
Thoughts become things. Are we thinking loving thoughts about life? Self, others, our earth, our job, our living, etc
There are only two emotions we can express and those two emotions are FEAR and LOVE. All the other emotions stem from these categories.
Choose LOVE. Celebrate LOVE!
What is Life Coaching?
by Tatiana Valadares
Coaching is all about getting you from the situation you are stuck in to where you want to be – faster. First, we identify what you’ve tried and what isn’t working for you. We ask the questions that bring awareness to the surface. Then we use self-discovery techniques to visualize a place where your life looks and feels better. Together we discover the options and prioritize solutions to the obstacle at hand and determine a plan of action. We identity your resources and how they can help you. Whether its Career, Relationships, Health, Finances, Happiness or Spirituality, together we’ll unravel the stubborn threads that are keeping you stuck and move toward a more authentic and joyful place.
Why would I need Life Coaching?
Anyone can benefit from coaching. Usually people seek help when they have an obstacle in their life that they can’t overcome. We all, at some point in our lives, come across obstacles that prevent us from moving forward. We get stuck. This may occur because of fear, lack of confidence in our own abilities, lack of motivation, poor communication, etc. Coaching helps bring motivation, planning, and new ideas or approaches to your life. These provide just what is needed to get you over the hurdle and back on track.
Situations that Four Pillars Life Coaching can help with:
- Grief or loss
- Illness recovery
- Lack of confidence, motivation, or life planning
- Post traumatic event recovery
- Relocation
- Stress and time management
- Discovering your life purpose or career
- Communication and relationship issues
- Spiritualty or inspirational guidance
What is the difference between Life Coaching and Therapy?
Psychotherapy works with the client who seeks relief from psychological or physical symptoms. The client wants emotional healing and relief of mental suffering. Therapy deals with diagnosing and healing the mental health of the client. Coaching deals with the client’s mental growth. The reason for the client seeking therapy is usually to get rid of some pain or discomfort, rather than wanting to move towards desired goals, which is the greater role of coaching. Coaching means taking an inventory of your current situation and determining how to get to the desired place quickly and satisfactorily, but without addressing the reasons that led the individual to stagnation. Therefore, one practice does not replace the other, but rather they are complimentary and work well together.
How long is an average Life Coaching Process?
Coaching sessions are typically held weekly and each session lasts on average one to two hours, all set in common agreement between the coach and clients. To be a completely flexible process, the coaching can be applied in the way the client feels more comfortable depending on the urgency of your goals. Some special programs suggest a certain number of sessions but the client is who decides the number of sessions they would like to do. The average varies between 5 and 12 sessions.
Do we have to see each other in person for the sessions?
Just as other forms of counseling, coaching sessions can be conducted in person, by phone, via internet (skype or facetime) as well as email, it all depends on the client’s preference and location. If the client choses to have our session by phone, the calls are made by us, at no cost to the client. The positive side of remote sessions is that you can be anywhere to attend the sessions, including the comfort of your own sofa. The forms and exercises are sent by email.
Is the information we share during our sessions confidential?
Four Pillars follows the ICF (International Coach Federation) code of ethics, so any information exchanged remains confidential unless the client authorizes in writing, a third party information or access to the sessions. There are, however, two extremely rare exceptions: one, if the client, by my estimation, becomes a danger to themselves or to another individual, or, if a court of law directly orders the coach to divulge such information to the court. As a Coach, we do not judge your situation, your plans or your feelings. We will not guide you to do what we or anyone else judges to be more correct or necessary. We simply bring forth your options and your choices are ultimately up to you.
Winter Skin Care Tips
By: Four Pillar’s Nancy Brown, Spa Director/Lead Aesthetician
Winter is an excellent time to spend some extra attention on your skin. With cooler temperatures and less time in the sun, it’s a great time to work on specific skin issues and enhance your glow.
Exfoliation and Peels:
This time of year the skin can appear dull, dry, and lifeless. Deep exfoliation removes the dull and dead layer of skin. This can be done with Microdermabrasion, Dermaplaning, or a series of Peels. These procedures are quick and effective at removing the superficial dead layer of skin. Exfoliation helps to improve the overall texture of the skin, minimize fine lines, minimize pore size, and even out the skin tone. At home exfoliation will pick up where professional treatments leave off. Use of a gentle scrub or a rotating facial brush no more than twice a week will keep the skin clear and healthy. Just be mindful to not over exfoliate, which can cause irritation or dry the skin out.
Correct Sun Damage:
Winter is the best time of year to correct all those dark spots that haunt our skin from the sun. The best way to treat sun damage is through a combination of exfoliating facials or peels along with lightening products that contain ingredients like hydroquinone, kojic acid, or hexarestorsinol. These product ingredients work by penetrating into the skin to slow the production of pigment deep in the skin. These products usually take a few weeks to work, and often the spots may appear slightly darker before they lighten. This is caused by the pigment lifting out. It is important to remember to use SPF when using a lightening product to ensure its effectiveness.
Change your products:
The cool, dry, winter air offers a great opportunity to switch things up with your products. This is the time of year to really keep things gentle. Look for a cleanser that will be effective but won’t strip the natural oils your skin needs. It’s also a great time to add a richer, night-time moisturizer. Winter is a great opportunity to use Retinol products to repair the skin along Hyaluronic Acid to keep the skin hydrated.
Facials:
Facials are recommended every 4-6 weeks. In addition to the relaxation and stress relief benefits, the improvement in your overall skin health is priceless. Facials help to keep the skin clear, properly balanced and hydrated, improves circulation which helps to promote healthy cell growth. The anti aging benefits of regular facials will keep your skin firm, healthy, and glowing.
Your skin is the largest organ of the human body. Take care of your skin and love the skin you’re in!
6 Time Management Tips for the Holidays
By Tatiana Valadares – Life Coach
Here we are at the most beautiful time of the year – a week before Christmas, and like it or not, the busiest time as well. Many of us find ourselves rushing around with too much to do and the beautiful season becomes exhausting.
I know exactly how December feels. My personal relationship with this month is quite stressful. I have 6 birthday celebrations in my family, I have to manage personal business as the fiscal year comes to a close both here and in my home country of Brazil, I share a home with three teenagers and one amazing man who deserves all my time and love. In addition, we celebrate Christmas twice – once in the Brazilian style and second time with American traditions. As a woman, I’m traditionally responsible for all of the shopping.
In order to not only survive but also enjoy the holiday season, I put together a few time management techniques for all of us to maintain our wellness and improve our productivity during this time of the year. Some apply to work, others to our personal lives, but all are applicable to lowering overall stress levels and promoting accountability.
1 – Prioritize – First, you can have a good talk with yourself and decide, based on your own limits and taking into consideration your lifestyle, your goals for the season. Decide what you need to accomplish and how much time you have available. Being mindful of the days remaining on the calendar, list all your tasks and remove the ones that do not qualify as a priority. Being aware of what is important to you and what is not is fundamental, not only for the holidays, but for life.
2 – Set Healthy Boundaries and learn how to say ‘no’ – As the famed investor Warren Buffet says – “The biggest difference between successful people and really successful people is that really successful people know how to say no.”
You are the one in control of your life and you know what is best for you. If you don’t, I suggest that you explore this territory within yourself a little bit more. Include reviewing your priorities and limits on your 2016 to-do-list, because the more you know yourself, the easier it becomes to set boundaries. Especially this time of the year when events and requests of your time increases dramatically. When something doesn’t feel like a priority to you, don’t feel guilty, don’t over explain yourself, just simply decline.
3 – Schedule –Place your priority items from your to-do-list on your calendar. If it’s scheduled, it’s done – that’s the rule. With the advances of technology today, we have a range of options for calendars and reminders that work like a miracle for every type of personality or tech-ability ”.
4 – Expect Delays and Downtime – Here is a great opportunity for you to practice compassion, patience and forgiveness. Learn that not everyone masters the art of managing time, so you will probably find yourself waiting extra minutes in your doctor’s office, lines at stores might be longer, and people in general will be running late. Take this extra time to exercise stillness and forgive, after all, this is what Christmas is all about. Have compassion and know that people are doing their best, even if their best isn’t very great.
5 – Don’t Catch the Multitask Train – Too much multitasking harms your ability to focus on the big picture and it can lower your productivity by up to 40%, says Peter Bregman, a blog writer for Harvard Business Review.
Sticking to your schedule and accomplishing your to-do list one-by-one will not only prevent stress but also accidents. How many of us had to go back to the store the day before Christmas during the rush hour of last minute shoppers to exchange something purchased by mistake due to being distracted and “talking on the phone while shopping”?
Being mindful about your activities and present in your tasks save a lot of anxiety and time.
6 – Take time to yourself – Last but not least, is to schedule (yes, schedule, to make sure it will be done!) a break. We all need to unplug for a while to be able to function better. Make time for a massage, for a skin care treatment or even some time alone at home for “Me-time” in a salt bath or on the couch reading a good book. Resting is very important to maintain your health and your cheerful mood.
Remember that these suggestions are not limited to the holidays, they also work all year long so you don’t need to put them away along with your Christmas Tree. If you find it difficult to manage your time and maintain healthy stress levels, I invite you to come with me in a Stress and Time Management Coaching Program at Four Pillars.
Happy Holidays!
Tatiana
11/11 New Beginnings
Today is a special and meaningful day. 11/11 marks new beginnings for Four Pillars.
We are working in our first location at San Marco Plaza and preparing for a 12/12 Grand Opening. We are so excited to bring new services to the Lakewood Ranch area. In addition, we are laying all the groundwork for our future location in Corporate Park with wellness services, educational experiences, and social activities that foster the four pillars of health.
What is the significance of the numbers 11/11? What is their meaning?
In Numerology, the 11 is a Master Number. So what does that mean? Master numbers are repeated numbers (11, 22, 33, and so on). Master numbers contain what we’d call a higher spiritual vibration, for lack of a better term.
First of all, the number 1 is all about new beginnings, independence, initiative, achievement, individuation, self-confidence, and innovative creativity.
Many say that when you see the repeating number 11:11 – when you look at the clock, for example – it’s a message from The Universe (or God, Angels, or whatever you believe in the spiritual realms).
When you see this number, it’s the Universe tapping you on the shoulder and giving you a solid “thumbs up!”
As for the date 11/11, this can also be seen as an opening, as a doorway so to speak. This also applies to the 11:11. If you look at the numbers, you can see this visual representation – each 11 looks like a door.
So today has a very special meaning to us at Four Pillars! Sign up for our newsletter so we can share our Grand Opening details with you!
Synchronicity
“When you want something, all the universe conspires in helping you to achieve it.” – Paulo Coehlo
When you truly focus on a goal, the universe is there to help you achieve it. Pieces fall into place, relationships develop and synchronicity happens. Aristotle, one of our greatest philosophers, believed that there is always a reason for everything that happens. Your experiences are designed to shape you, define you, and hopefully grow you into your highest potential possible.
In June 2015 that’s exactly what happened in Chicago for Four Pillars. We attended the Celebrate Your Life conference to connect with national speakers for the sole purpose of bringing them to Four Pillars and the Lakewood Ranch/Sarasota area. Celebrate Your Life conferences are produced by Mishka Productions, led by Liz Dawn for almost 20 years. They attract people from all over the world and feature workshops and presentations from internationally renowned inspirational speakers and NY Times Best Selling Authors who have appeared on thousands of television shows and radio programs.
Just some of the featured speakers included:
- James Redfield, Author of The Celestine Prophecy
- Neale Donald Walsch, Author of Conversations with God (NYTimes Best Seller, 2 years)
- Panache Desai, Author and International Speaker
- Dr. Joe Dispenza, Author of You Are the Placebo
- Andy Dooley, Vibration Activation and Law of Attraction Expert
- Arielle Ford, Author of The Soulmate Secret
- and more
Synchronicities started for Four Pillars upon registration for the event. Changes to flight schedules, changes to attendees and more all happened for a reason. One of our goals was to have one on one time with speakers to tell them about Four Pillars and peak their interest in bringing their phenomenal messages and presentations to Lakewood Ranch.
After traveling on a Friday to the event, we settled into the hotel to regroup for a full evening of the opening celebration. While regrouping in the hotel room, we talked about some of the goals for the weekend. One was to talk with Dr. Joe Dispenza about being a speaker at Four Pillars. To prepare, we developed and practiced an “elevator speech”—the 30-second pitch you give someone to tell them about your company’s mission. Shortly after practicing our elevator speech in the hotel room, we stepped onto the elevator and who do you think entered with us? Yes! Dr. Joe Dispenza. Talk about synchronicity and serendipity. And, yes, after giving our elevator speech, he agreed it was destiny! He also later laughed at the “elevator speech” story!
There were many other coincidental conversations at just the right time during the weekend. We even learned that Andy Dooley (a Law of Attraction expert and the most energetic Vibration Activation coach) went to Ringling College of Art and Design right in our own backyard. He is thrilled to come back to his stomping grounds and bring his messages to Lakewood Ranch.
After the conclusion of the conference, Cheri was standing in the lobby thinking if there was anyone else she wished she had connected with. And Ariel Ford came to mind. Sure enough, Ariel was the next person that walked by, and the “elevator speech” came in handy one final time.
Look for synchronicities in your life. They are a sign that you are on the right path! Follow us for more to come on these awesome speakers and exactly when they will be coming to Four Pillars!
Cheri explaining the story of Four Pillars to James Redfield, Author of The Celestine Prophecy.
10 Year Celebration
10 years is such a significant event!
Turning 10 is double digits as kids say. It’s exciting to reach that milestone. It means you are growing and getting big.
To those that read numbers and understand their meaning, it represents the end of a cycle and the beginning of another.
Four Pillars recently attended the Lakewood Ranch Business Alliance 10 Year Anniversary, the Silver Soiree. The event was about networking, celebrating, and creating relationships for business; what the LWRBA is all about for the Lakewood Ranch, Sarasota, Manatee area.
We can’t help but hope and dream what we will look like in 10 years for the Lakewood Ranch area. We want to foster the mind, body, spirit and social connections through wellness services, educational experiences and social activities. We hope in 10 years this is what we will look like:
- People working on their novels in our garden/meditation area
- Friends gathering to listen to live music around our fire pit
- Clubs and organizations having their monthly/weekly meetings on our nature preserve enjoying the atmosphere and connecting with each other
- Photography clubs using the nature preserve for class and inspiration
- People pampering their bodies with spa services to enhance their well-being and feel energized
- National speakers bringing their messages and energy to the Lakewood Ranch area
- A place people come to relax, unwind, and meet friends
- Couples and friends meeting for a healthy lunch
- Intimate weddings beside our beautiful lake filled with lotus flowers
- Yoga classes on our deck for a tranquil environment
- Art clubs using nature for inspiration
- People picking up something special from our gift shop for a 10 year anniversary surprise
- People stopping by for a peaceful walk in our meditation garden and a healthy smoothie
- People walking away with a renewed sense of purpose or direction after a session with one of our life coaches
- Bachelorette parties getting facials, massages and getting ready for the big day
- Aerial yoga and aerial silks clubs on our deck
- Bossa Nova music flowing through beautiful sunset skies in the early evening
We met many new friends at our debut during the Lakewood Ranch Business Alliance 10 year anniversary celebration. We hope to grow with them and see them in another 10 years with many memories and stories to share!
“For Cheri Christiansen, the event was a debut. A newly recruited alliance member, the life coach will soon begin building a venue in the commerce park to offer yoga and meditation classes by day and a social wine lounge at night. “We break ground in a month and a half,” she said.”
Welcome to Four Pillars!
What if you found your “go to” place? That place where you could relax, rejuvenate, restore what you and your body need?
What if you were surrounded by positive people to help build you up for your highest potential?
And, what if this place was peaceful and infused with elements of our natural earth so you feel grounded. A worldly environment that makes you feel as if you’ve escaped to faraway places like Spain or Bali.
What if this place was a perfect balance of mind, body, spirit and social connections?
This place exists (well, it’s on it’s way)!
We’re building a community and a physical location to do just that and more.
Four Pillars is a new retreat center located in warm sunny Lakewood Ranch, Florida. It is a place where you will have the opportunity to enjoy spa treatments, yoga classes & meditation, life coaching, a healthy café and a social lounge venue to connect with others.
We are dedicated to be that “go to” place. Come relax, rejuvenate and restore what you and your body need.
Explore all we are and more! www.fourpillarsflorida.com
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